Being waitlisted is one of the weirdest feelings ever. It’s like I’m stuck in the middle; right in between an acceptance and a rejection. Getting my first waitlist decision was frankly very emotionally confusing.

On March 28th, UC Berkeley came out with their admission decision for the class of 2023. I was eagerly excited, I’ve spent months awaiting this decision, and years dreaming about this school. I took classes there every summer, ever since freshman year. I was already involved with the campus, and truly I felt like I was already a bear, which is what made this decision the most exciting for me.

The Thursday of March 28th was actually a really amazing day. I went grocery shopping with my friend, and we cooked a really nice meal together, we later went to the mall and grabbed some ice cream. I was with my friend, Andrea Sanchez when I read my decision which came out at exactly 3 pm. It didn’t take long for people to start posting their acceptance letters all over social media.

Suddenly my nervousness arose. UC Berkeley has been my dream school for the longest time. Its all I ever thought of. I literally daydreamt about going to school here. It was always my main thought whenever I was in a class that I hated, and it was my motivation to strive and succeed in classes at some point.

I logged in to my portal. “You have a new application update.”

I closed my eyes and opened them.

“Dear Annett,

Thank you for applying to the University of California, Berkeley…The office of admissions carefully reviewed your application and we are not able to offer you admission at this time”

Once I read that, I knew… I automatically assumed that I was rejected. I’ve read that email before. I know what an acceptance letter sounds like, and I definitely know what a rejection letter sounded like, and that… that was it.

I shrugged… Acting like I didn’t really care, as if that hasn’t been my dream for years, but at this point, I knew that I had other options and I had to carry on with my future.

Andrea wasn’t convinced that the email only contained that little information and encouraged me to keep reading.

“As this is not a reflection of your ability, but rather a space limitation we would like to offer you a position on our waitlist for openings that may become available for the 2019-20 academic year.”

“Oh….. I got waitlisted.” was what I said. I wasn’t stoked if I’m being honest. I’ve never been waitlisted from a school, and I had only been used to rejections and acceptances, I didn’t really know how to feel.

Do they want me or not? I was kind of angry… Because it felt like my emotions were being played with. It’s like I was almost there… I was almost accepted, but I wasn’t close enough…

If you’ve been waitlisted I just want to say that, you will end up where you need to be. Take this time to reflect on your dreams and goals, and maybe you’ll realize that this maybe isn’t the best thing for you.